2018 Predictions Guaranteed or Your Money Back
It’s time to gaze into the ol’
crystal ball, say crazy stuff, and hope that no one checks after the fact.
But first, these were my
predictions from a year ago:
1. Trump walks back all the trade
protectionist talk, much to the chagrin of his core followers. The new base he cultivates: truck drivers
angry about autonomous vehicles. Alas,
we are still all #MAGA, all the time.
2.Major online security breach
leads to huge uptick in high-end credit cards with multiple verification steps,
and huge chill in the market for virtual home assistants (e.g. Google Home). Hello, Equifax! (Laughs and then cries.)
3. Concussion-related complications
for two high-profile QBs - one active, one retired - are the final prod for
major rules changes to protect players.
Alas, lots of big names, but no rule changes…but maybe better equipment
is on the way?
4. The song of the summer will be
an out-of-nowhere mashup of socially conscious hip hop and good ol' boy
country. The song of the summer was
probably either “Despacito” or “I’m the One,” so…an out-of-nowhere mashup of
bubble gum hip hop and Hispanic/Palestinian?
5. A robust year for the global economy
and world stock markets, but signs of a pullback at the very end. Yes and…maybe?
Eh, not bad. Some forecasts for 2018:
1. Facebook has a “Wells Fargo”
moment (i.e. millions of fake accounts, and not for fake news’ sake but to game
ad rates), and we all have a collective “wait, we should probably read the fine
print” moment with our social media accounts.
2. Donald Trump? I can't predict next week, let alone next year.
3. We “hack” sleep to the point
that how we went to bed in 2017 will seem so archaic.
4. Another “song of the summer”
that isn’t in the English language; but this time it’s not Spanish or even
Korean (sorry, BTS fans), but rather some sort of Euro/Caribbean creole.
5. It's the Year of the Native American, as low-level outcry about historical treatment and present woes boil over into a national discussion and reshape our approach towards Thanksgiving.
6. Definitive proof is found that the author of the book of Hebrews in the Christian Bible was Priscilla and Aquila (but mostly Priscilla).
7a. A championship parade down
South Broad Street.
7b. A certain online retailer commits
to the City of Brotherly Love for their 2nd headquarters.
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