Here are a few excerpts from a book I recently read, "The Love Songs of W.E.B. DuBois," by Honoree Fanonne Jeffers.
73-91 born SEA lived SJC 00 married (Amy) home (UCity) 05 Jada (PRC) 07 Aaron (ROC) 15 Asher (OKC) | 91-95 BS Wharton (Acctg Mgmt) 04-06 MPA Fels (EconDev PubFnc) 12-19 Prof GAFL517 (Fels) | 95-05 EVP Enterprise Ctr 06-12 Dir Econsult Corp 13-26 Principal Econsult Solutions 18-21 Phila School Board 19- Owner Lee A Huang Rentals LLC | Bds/Adv: Penn Weitzman, PIDC, YMCA | Mmbr: Brit Amer Project, James Brister Society
Here are a few excerpts from a book I recently read, "The Love Songs of W.E.B. DuBois," by Honoree Fanonne Jeffers.
Apropos to absolutely nothing of consequence, I thought it would be fun to document the little rituals that go into my hobby of playing golf. You may find today's post interesting or incredibly mundane, either way I'm putting it down for posterity's sake.
To begin with, why rituals at all? Whether it is superstition, habit, or positive reinforcement, golfers tend to stick to routines to put themselves in a good frame of mind, which is important since the sport is far more mental than physical. I am no different, and my approach to a day spent on the course is informed by such impulses.
Let's start with the night before, in which I've gotten my bag and any other items ready, as well as what I'm going to wear, which of course involves checking the weather (especially since I will play in all conditions, from blazing hot to dangerously cold). This also includes getting food ready, for before, during, and after the round - more on this in a second.
I don't need a marathon practice session on site before every round, but nor do I like to rush, so my schedule is set so that I can aim to arrive 30 to 40 minutes in advance of my tee time. Keep in mind that I often get an insanely early tee time, and that sometimes I'm playing quite far away from home. For example, I recall one time I met up with a colleague at his country club on Long Island for a 9:30am tee time, and he was surprised to know I had driven in from home that same morning and hadn't spend the night, since it was a good 3-hour drive from Philly. (I didn't have the heart to tell him that not only had I left my house earlier that morning, but I had also gotten 2 full hours of hiking and biking in at nearby nature spots before arriving at his country club for warm-up.)
Traffic is less of a factor early in the morning but it does require keeping an eye on, so where possible I do look and adjust when I leave the house accordingly. That makes the drive itself less manic, and I further put myself in a chill mood by bringing classical music CDs to play in the car. So, whether the drive is pleasant or I'm bumper to bumper with angry honking drivers, I can have a moment of serenity as I transition from home to course.
If I'm going straight from my morning workout to the course, I usually pack some fruit to eat along the way. If I've had time for breakfast, the fruit is still packed but gets eaten after the round. Also packed is two peanut butter and apple butter sandwiches for post-round. And during the summer, I'll usually pack an extra energy drink to drink after the round.
Upon arrival, I get my golf bag and golf cart set up. Club covers come off, as does the case for my range finder; all that gets left in the car. One energy drink and two bananas are transferred from cooler to golf bag. Car keys go in the golf bag, and 3 golf balls, 3 tees, ball mark repair, and ball spotter coin are placed in my back pocket where the car keys used to be. I move my glove and my notebook to the big pocket of my golf bag, and put on and tie my golf shoes and then head out from the car.
I'll hit balls if time permits and the range is easily accessible, but usually I don't actually hit balls. I do want to stretch my back out good, since I'm dealing with a lumbar issue that does a lot better with some mobility stretches prior to a round. I then take a few, slow practice swings with every club in my bag on a patch of grass, starting with my wedges and working my way through my irons to my woods. Since I've only been playing for 3ish years, my body hasn't yet institutionalized the mechanics of a golf swing into its muscle memory. So giving a couple swings to each club is a chance to get comfortable with things like swing path, grip strength, and tempo.
If at all possible, I do like to roll a few putts to get a sense of the greens as well as my interaction with my putter. Specifically, I set up my 3 golf balls one club length from a hole and putt until I make all 3. Then I count off 10 steps (roughly 30 feet) and have a go at 3 putts from that length, and then 20 steps (60 feet). Depending on how I do and how much time I have, I might try the same lengths but from different angles (e.g. uphill vs. downhill).
I'll save the rituals I have during the golf itself for another day. Let's skip to post-game. After the round is over, I often have to jet home for whatever's next on my calendar. But, when possible, when I get home I clean my clubs and my shoes and leave them to dry overnight before putting everything away (including restocking my bag with balls and tees if I lost a bunch during the round). I also try to do the same back stretches, as soon after the round as possible, just to preempt any stiffness from the morning after. I also tally up my score and count up good shots and bad shots, and then take a picture of my results as well as of the course scorecard to post on social media along with some commentary on how I did.
I suspect fellow golfers have similar routines that are not very different from mine. As noted above, at some point, maybe I'll write down what rituals I have for, you know, when I'm actually playing. But for now, thought it would be fun to record the before and the after.
Here are a few excerpts from a book I recently read, "It," by Stephen King.
George had gone obediently to get these things. He could hear his mother playing the piano, not Für Elise now but something else he didn’t like so well—something that sounded dry and fussy; he could hear rain flicking steadily against the kitchen windows. These were comfortable sounds, but the thought of the cellar was not a bit comfortable. He did not like the cellar, and he did not like going down the cellar stairs, because he always imagined there was something down there in the dark. That was silly, of course, his father said so and his mother said so and, even more important, Bill said so, but still—
He did not even like opening the door to flick on the light because he always had the idea—this was so exquisitely stupid he didn’t dare tell anyone—that while he was feeling for the light switch, some horrible clawed paw would settle lightly over his wrist . . . and then jerk him down into the darkness that smelled of dirt and wet and dim rotted vegetables.
Stupid! There were no things with claws, all hairy and full of killing spite. Every now and then someone went crazy and killed a lot of people—sometimes Chet Huntley told about such things on the evening news—and of course there were Commies, but there was no weirdo monster living down in their cellar. Still, this idea lingered. In those interminable moments while he was groping for the switch with his right hand (his left arm curled around the doorjamb in a deathgrip), that cellar smell seemed to intensify until it filled the world. Smells of dirt and wet and long-gone vegetables would merge into one unmistakable ineluctable smell, the smell of the monster, the apotheosis of all monsters. It was the smell of something for which he had no name: the smell of It, crouched and lurking and ready to spring. A creature which would eat anything but which was especially hungry for boymeat.
Bill leaves… but returns the next week, determined to stick with it. In the time between he has written a story called ‘The Dark’, a tale about a small boy who discovers a monster in the cellar of his house. The little boy faces it, battles it, finally kills it. He feels a kind holy exaltation as he goes about the business of writing this story; he even feels that he is not so much telling the story as he is allowing the story to flow through him. At one point he puts his pen down and takes his hot and aching hand out into ten-defree December cold whewre it nearly smokes from the temperature change. He walks around, green cut-off boots squeaking in the snow like tiny shutter-hinges which need oil, and his head seems to bulge with the story; it is a little scary the way it seems to need to get out. He feels that if it cannot escape by way of his racing hand that it will pop his eyes out in its urgency to escape and be concrete. ‘Going to knock the shit out of it,’ he confides to the blowing winter dark, and laughs a little – a shaky laugh. He is aware that is has finally discovered how to do just that – after years of trying he has finally found the starter button on the vast dead bulldozer taking up so much space inside his head. It is revving, revving. It is nothing pretty, this big machine. It was not made for taking pretty girls to proms. It is not a status symbol. It means business. It can knock things down. If he isn’t careful, it will knock him down.
“Oh my fadder and I are one,” she said, “just me, just him, and dear, if you are wise you will run, run back to where you came from, run quickly, because to stay will mean worse than your death. No one who dies in Derry really dies. You knew that before; believe it now.”
One by one they turned to look at Mike, Mike with his dark skin. They looked at him carefully, cautiously, thoughtfully. Mike had felt such curiosity before - there had not been a time in his life that he had not felt it - and he looked back candidly enough.
Bill looked from Mike to Richie. Richie met his eyes. And Bill seemed to almost hear the click--some final part fitting neatly into a machine of unknown intent. He felt ice-chips scatter up his back. We're all together now, he thought, and the idea was so strong, so right, that for a moment he thought he might have spoken it aloud. But of course there was no need to speak it aloud; he could see it in Richie's eyes, in Ben's, in Eddie's, in Beverly's, in Stan's.
We're all together now, he thought again. Oh God help us. Now it really starts. Please God, help us.
"What's your name, kid?" Beverly asked.
"Mike Hanlon."
"You want to shoot off some firecrackers?" Stan asked, and Mike's grin was answer enough.
Christ, Richie thinks, opening a fresh beer for himself. it isn’t bad enough It can be any damn monster It wants to be, and it isn’t bad enough that It can feed off our fears. It also turns out to be Rodney Dangerfield in drag.
Beverly glanced across the table from time to time at Bill, noting his clean hands, his blue eyes, the fine red hair. As he moved the little silver shoe he was using as a marker around the board, she thought, If he held my hand, I think I’d be so glad I’d probably die. A warm light seemed to glow briefly in her chest and she smiled secretly down at her hands.
"Running while Black" and navigating city streets as a female jogger both require more vigilance than I need to summon. But urban routes, particularly at my usual pre-dawn hour, do necessitate some heightened awareness of potential dangers. One morning last month it seemed like I hit for the cycle:
* Car turning right that I saw well before it saw me crossing the street so I bolted myself on the curb to let it pass (which it did without stopping even though there was a stop sign)
* A gaggle of college women up late, potentially tipsy, fanned out on the sidewalk so I had to squeeze myself onto gravel to get around them, while one of them remarked loudly "awfully weird time to be running"
* Dude toked up out of his mind who I approached from the rear and therefore chose to give wide berth to lest I startle him from his stupor
* Woman walking her dog but really checking her phone, meaning that if the dog sensed any sort of threat from me she might not have been able to restrain him, so I chose to run in the street parallel to them rather than get anywhere close to them
It doesn't matter if I'm not planning to harm any of these other humans or that I have right to my part of the pavement. The ultimate goal is to avoid trouble.
Running for me is a time to zone out and think about nothing, or alternatively to process something going on in my life. But you do have to keep a least a little part of your brain on patrol.
Here are a few excerpts from a book I recently read, "Leonardo Da Vinci," by Walter Isaacson.
I really resonated with this longform X post on how the advent of AI in coding changes what adds value for software developers, and especially this quote:
The companies winning today aren't the ones with the best products. They're the ones with the most direct relationships with customers. The product is just the artifact through which you serve them. Your audience is your moat. Your email list is your moat. Your community is your moat. Your reputation is your moat.
I've never been in the software business, but I have been in the professional services business, and I think it is very applicable. Whether you're a lawyer, accountant, or (like I was for 20 years) an economic consultant, the technical aspects of what you're doing are getting turbo-charged by AI tools so that you can produce work faster and of higher quality and accuracy, and not just on the margins but by orders of magnitude.
But, that also means your customers and competitors can also attempt the same. Maybe you're better than they are, but maybe you're not, and even if you are, maybe it doesn't matter because the savings in cost or time or convenience more than makes up for the difference in quality or accuracy.
But the professional services business has never just about better, faster, stronger at the technical tasks. Oh sure, you have to be top-notch at AI tools (just like spreadsheets and calculators before them). But that's not really the value-add.
What is, as the post suggests, is the connection to your customers. And to be more specific, not just any connection, but one in which they trust you to lead them to the right answers in the right way.
"Trust" is far fuzzier than tax law or software code or multivariate regressions. But it is the very foundation upon which a successful practice is built, as well as a successful employee in that practice.
There is a relatively easy part of this and a very hard part of this, although both of them take effort and intentionality. The relatively easy part is something I used to tell my co-workers, which is that before you dive into any sort of analysis, ask yourself what the problem is that I'm trying to solve, figure out what work can help answer that question, and venture a hypothesis as to what a likely result is. We get so tunnel-visioned in our training and tools that we can do a massive amount of work that is impressive and precise and yet completely wrong. And, if we don't take a little bit of time to do some initial thinking, we will not only waste a bunch of time doing the work but we will also have no idea if the result of that work makes any sense or not. Which is a dangerous place to be, to give your client (or, if you're an employee, your boss) a bunch of work you've produced, which may be impressive looking and thorough in coverage but you don't even know if you went in the right direction let alone landed on the bullseye.
Which brings me to the harder thing, which is where trust really comes from, which is having the sort of reputation that customers instinctively know to come to you because you will provide value to them. Which is related to the first point, since of course if you send your customers garbage answers they're not going to think very highly of you. But of course it's more than that. It's having a personal relationship with them. It's having helped them in the past, both formally and informally. It's living your life in a way that is consistent with the kinds of values your customers benefit from and want to be associated with.
And, ultimately, it's about keeping your word. If you say you're going to help, you help. If you say you're going to ship by end of month, you ship by end of month. If you say the trend is up, they can take to the bank that the trend is up; if you say they should do X, they can take to the bank that having done X they will see the benefit of it.
That's what I call integrity. It takes a lifetime to build up. And it takes 100 percent of your energy to maintain, both because it is an always-on trait and also because the potential to ruin it all in seconds is ever-present.
AI has disrupted and accelerated and reshaped, yes. But it has always been true that there was an aspect of work that could be done by almost everyone, and aspect of work that involved customer relationships and personal integrity and ironclad trust. That remains the most important thing.
You know about my travel bucket list, but I am also working on a content bucket list as well. We all have our personal preferences and guilty pleasures when it comes to the entertainment we consume. But I do think there is something to be said about what may be referred to as "canon," which is to say what are the authoritative items in our civilization that one simply must be aware in order to understand our civilization.
And so, while I may gravitate to my individual favs when it comes to books, movies, and TV, I also want to be aware of what is truly "must-consume," and then make intentional effort to get to it. These are, after all, by definition, the stories that define our age, and to not know them is to miss a little of what our age means.
This summer may afford me the opportunity to curate, finalize, and publish my take on what these items are. Although I suspect that, not only will there be new entrants every year, but I will invariably miss older stuff and need to add it to the list. So, even if I do put it out there, you must consider it an evolving, fluid thing.
You may wonder why I'm limiting myself to books, movies, and TV? Music is probably the most glaring omission, since music absolutely defines an era. One can argue the same for theater, visual arts, and speeches. I may get there, because I don't disagree. But I feel like I'll have my hands full with just books, movies, and TV.
At any rate, I welcome your suggestions and invite you to join me in the consumption. Let's get to it!
"Memory" is a fraught thing. Cherished memories, traumatic ones, memories that help you do well in school and work, and those that put others behind bars. So there's a lot at stake when you try to recall something that went through your brain before, whether a minute or a lifetime ago.
I've been brain-dumping memories of mine from different times of my life, using this time between jobs to record moments and anecdotes and observations, to see if patterns emerge that help my self-awareness and ultimately guide and support whatever I do next in my career. At times, I find myself laughing out loud, or on the verge of tears, or sitting in stunned silence. Memories literally take you back, and some do so quite viscerally.
Of course, rare is the human with total recall, to have access to every single interaction in their lives dating back to childhood. Instead, our brains shed content all the time, and we're left with some strong memories and other trace ones.
It occurs to me that this culling, in a weird sort of way, goes in both directions. We are wired in our Western world to view time as an arrow, and so we go from past into future, and stranded as we are in the present at any given moment when we look back we hold certain memories from our past. So it seems strange to say that selectivity of memory runs both from past to present and from present to past.
But this is what I mean. In our past, our future at that time contained a multitude of possible paths. As we moved into the future, of course we were only able to take one. Many memories were impactful enough to our lives at the time that they were part of what helped us to determine what that path might be. A positive experience in sports forms in us a framework for how we will handle teamwork and discipline and success and failure, and as a result we shed certain ways we might think and behave and lock in on a specific way to think and behave. Conversely, a bad experience in school gives us a vivid lesson in what direction not to go in, and we shut that door off along with all the paths that could've been built from that. Memories, in short, are experience along our path which help us figure out where to go next, which is to say they guide us as to which paths not to take going forward.
But the culling does its own time-travel, too. What do I mean by that? The present version of ourselves is built on the experiences we had in our past. But it in turn represents a frame of reference by which we look back into the past. Memories are moments that help us select one direction over another. But memories are also selective, in that what we remember when we look back is not perfect recall but rather what we want to remember based on who we are now.
Extreme versions of this are certain memories that we have, for good or bad, walled off from thinking about in the present. In an act of self-preservation, we are avoiding that which is traumatic or shameful or otherwise too hard to hold in the present. But there are less dramatic versions of this, in which we choose to remember what the hard lessons taught us and neglect the more mundane ways in which we were shaped for the present, or where we choose to think ourselves a slightly more noble version of ourselves while conveniently neglecting ways we were jerky to others along the way.
Whether from past to present or present to past, remembering memories, writing them down, and trying to draw some themes from them has been an interesting exercise. You should try it sometime! You may be similarly informed about what you do and don't remember, how memories teach you what foundations your current identity is built on and in turn how your current identity informs what you remember and how you remember it.
I'm a naturally impatient person, and I am self-aware enough to know this is a bad thing that I need to work on. Impatience is, in my book, literally a sin, in that it acts like I have a better handle than my God on the timing of something. It is also a jerky way to act to and around others, as if you're better than them because your time is more important than theirs. So it is right that we call it out in our lives and make effort to root it out of our behavior.
And yet. There is a way in which patience is an excuse for inaction, in ways that are not good for us or others. Having a predisposition for action can be a good thing, when that action is beneficial and when the default is to procrastinate or be cowardly. So this too is something I'm trying to work on, which is that when something needs to be said or done and others are being waffly, being willing to be uncomfortable or unpopular and launching out into whatever needs to be said or done.
Patience is a virtue. But impatience can be too.
This is more of a placeholder than a post, in that today I want to dive into a topic that will require more thought and more posts in the future, which is what my particular faith perspective is and how it has been shaped by the circumstances of my life. This blog is entitled, “The Musings of an Urban Christian,” after all, so it is natural that in this space I will express a specific worldview and that that worldview will be informed by my unique set of experiences and environments.
Before getting biographical, though, let me contemplate how else this works, and then God willing I will have time and inspiration to go deeper on different facets of my own journey:
1. For some, faith is a moral guidebook that governs how we ought to live and why. Such a perspective is governed by things like ethics (rules which we should follow) and the afterlife (post-life consequences based on how we actually lived), and can look more bookish to the world around it.
2. For some, faith is the context in which we play out a certain role in society and assemble with others like us. So, everyone in our worship services dresses alike, acts the same, and inhabits a similar status in our community. This can run the gamut, from upper-crusters living out a country club existence in a church setting, to rebels cutting against the grain of what is deemed respectable.
3. For some, faith is a mission, a calling on one’s own life and a purpose for one’s group to come together to achieve. Whether that north star is more spiritual (saving souls) or physical (serving the poor), it dominates our sense of belief and organizes our expressions of that belief.
4. For some, faith is about redemption, individually or as a people. God is approached with more than a little hint of desperation, for we fall woefully short and require great mercy to be made whole again, and worship service is about exalting either present graces received or future salvation secured.
5. For some, faith is defined by musical style. Worship is made central to faith, and the particular chosen form of worship considered to be the zenith of faith expression, whether contemporary or classical.
6. For some, faith would not be explicitly stated as not important, but it essentially is a lighter touch in one’s life. A loosely held sense of rights and wrongs, and a few traditions in which that faith is observed in public, but otherwise a deeply personal sense of inner peace or internal compass in an otherwise faith-light life.
7. For some, faith is an even lighter touch than that. The
rational dominates, science has completely squeezed out the divine, and all
that’s left is a sense of ethical code by which people can reasonably coexist,
without any space for wonder or prayer.
9. For some, faith is deeply personal, not to be shared with or expressed to others, and in some ways not to be articulated even to one’s own self. It is by definition, in this way, something that is abstract and internal.
10. For some, faith is the opposite of abstract and internal, but something that is understood, experienced, and expressed in community. In this context, which governs most of the world besides the more independent-minded Western world, it is literally impossible for someone to have a set of beliefs apart from that of their family and community.
I tried to express these different viewpoints as neutrally as possible, even as I’m sure you can see my biases creeping in. Perhaps you resonated with some descriptions, found my words unfair for others, and recoiled with horror at still others. I’ll hope to pick up on this thread in the future, as far as what I believe and why I have come to believe what I believe. I encourage you to do the same!
For the first time in 20 years, I'm no longer employed at Econsult Solutions, Inc. I'm proud of what I did there, especially to have seen our younger principals mature and take on more of the mantle of leadership. And now I am in a mix of job search, travel, and leisure writing. Will keep you posted with new developments, I'm as eager as you to know what they are!
Here are a few excerpts from a book I recently read, "The Love Songs of W.E.B. DuBois," by Honoree Fanonne Jeffers. Though he ar...