We Can't Handle the Truth

 

 

Read what you will into today's post, I am not trying to grind a particular political ax. I do want to call out that, for all the talk about elevating the truth, most of us don't actually want the truth, at least enough to pay the cost associated with it.

What do I mean? On shallow issues, we prefer to have our ears tickled than to have to absorb something less pleasant or more complicated. Honestly, folks, when you ask your significant other, "how do I look," do you want constructive criticism that will improve your aesthetic or do you just want them to say "marvelous!"?

On another level, we are invested in our opinions, so we are inclined to believe things that reinforce those opinions and avoid or discount things that challenge them. Whether this is superficial things like sports or music, or deeper things like politics and economics, when was the last time you honestly kept an open mind about something, kept your mouth shut when someone offered a contrary thought, and actually conceded the point and even changed your mind? 

In these cases, the truth truly is better for you, because it enhances your worldview or maybe even gets you to turn around when you were previously hurtling towards danger. Yet, we actively reject the truth in order to soothe our need to be affirmed that what we now believe is correct and doesn't need to be adjusted.

As a husband, parent, manager, and civic leader, I've tried very hard to lean into all that goes into actively seeking the truth. Sometimes I have to bite my tongue and take deep breaths in order to keep my mouth shut and my ears open. Sometimes I have to scold myself for being rigid in my thinking in order to dislodge myself towards changing my attitude, my opinion, and my actions. Even when I know it's for the best, it can be a bitter pill to swallow even as I know the pill is good for me.

What about you? When did you last seek out, listen to, and affirm an opposing perspective? When did you, even when the setting gave you room to have the last word, just kept your mouth shut and said thanks? When could you honestly say you were willing to pay the full price for hearing and receiving the truth? It takes significant effort for me, and I don't always put in that effort, even when I know it's the right thing to do and I want to be known as being truth-seeking and open-minded. The truth, it seems, is more elusive, and our commitment to it far weaker, than we'd like to admit.