ERRANDS, ERRANDS, AND MORE ERRANDS

Just to pick up on yesterday?s blog, I feel like one of my main roles as a husband is to run errands. Fellas, are you hearing me on this? Not that I?m bashing on my wife; on the contrary, I kind of dig errands. I ask Amy if there?s anything I can do for her, more than she asks me to do something for her.

I remember having a bachelor party dinner for a good friend of mine last year, and at one point, all of us old married farts were schooling the groom-to-be with nuggets of wisdom. One person said, ?It?s not about doing stuff for your wife, it?s about spending time with her.? Other husbands nodded in hearty assent.

But I wasn?t sure I agreed. Part of it is that while it is the wife that typically wants to spend more quality time than the husband, in my marriage it?s the opposite. Amy needs lots of alone time, especially after a grueling week of work. And while I certainly have a category for individual pursuits, I?m probably in need of more together time than she is.

But there?s also another angle to this issue, which is related to yesterday?s blog. If your focus is on dinners out, walks along the waterfront, and Ben Stiller DVD rentals, who?s taking care of getting the car tuned up, buying groceries, or making sure the bills are paid?

Maybe I?m just busier than most, but I have a limited number of waking hours, and a massive to-do list of errands to get through. Many husbands and counselors might say, ?All the more to make sure you?re having quality time.? OK, fine; then you wash my dishes, clean my windows, and unclog my roof gutter. Anybody out there with any advice on how to make sure errands don?t hog all of my non-work time? Anybody out there with a word on how to strike a balance between being responsible with errands without having them squeeze out social time?