Lessons Learned

Without delving into too many details (I acknowledge I'm an over-sharer but even I have limits), I want to consolidate a few takeaways from being in therapy this year. None of these insights are earth-shattering or revealing, but I must confess they are hard enough for me to accept and live out that I am taking today's blog post to claim them in the hopes that that will help them to stick better. If you need to hear these truths too then I'm glad to have shared. 

1. For those of us who are naturally hard on ourselves, it may be helpful to imagine that you are observing yourself from afar. What kind word would you offer to someone in your situation? Whatever it is, say it to yourself and allow yourself to receive it.

2. I am allowed to just be, without any agenda or accomplishment.

3. However much influence you may have on someone's life, you can't will the right path for them. In fact, more often than we are willing to admit, we can't even know for sure what that path should be.

4. Having the hard conversation is easier than the dysfunction we create for ourselves and others in the process of avoiding the hard conversation.

5. Decide in advance what's important enough that you are willing to pay a steep cost to live it out. Because along the way costs will be exacted, some small and some quite large, and it helps that you've already determined you're ready to bear them.