Too Short for a Blog Post, Too Long for a Tweet 287

 

Here are a couple of excerpts from a book I recently read, "13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success," by Amy Morin. 

 

Like many kids who have been taught “mistakes should be prevented,” Mason put more energy into hiding his mistakes than learning from them. His mother had spent so much time focusing on the importance of doing everything right that he wasn’t sure what to do when he did something wrong. 

When kids get the message that mistakes are bad—whether they think mistakes are embarrassing or they don’t want someone else to be upset—they become good at covering them up. But unless they acknowledge these mistakes, they won’t ever learn from them.

When your child succeeds: Discuss areas where he can improve. Recognizing mistakes is key to challenging him to do better next time. But make sure you also congratulate him on what he did well. Focusing too much on his mistakes could backfire. 

When your child fails: It doesn’t matter whether you talk about the positive or the negative. What matters is that you talk about it. So ask your child what he learned and how he thinks he did. Although talking may be the last thing your child wants to do when he messes up, debriefing is what turns a failed venture into a learning opportunity.