In the Out Crowd
Church retreats in high school and college were, for me and my friends, a great opportunity to play hoops. The usual Saturday afternoon free time was spent almost exclusively to "fellowshipping" over competitive games, good exercise, and the occasional smack talk.
One summer retreat, my hand was in a cast (ironically, I had broken it playing basketball). So when Saturday afternoon free time rolled around, all my friends headed for the courts. I instinctively headed there with them, but found sitting on the sideline to be not nearly as much fun as being in between the lines. So I left the area in search of an alternative free time activity.
I found a handful of guys moping around. These were guys on the outside of the social structure, mostly because of their lack of interest and/or talent in sports. For an afternoon, I was one of them. And it struck me how unwelcome this group must have felt at the retreat, and perhaps among the entire church, just because they weren't into sports. Having studied Jesus' life during the school year, I wondered if we weren't doing a terrible thing here, outcasting these guys and making them feel so unwelcome and outsiderish.
I'd like to say that I got religion (literally) and found myself hanging out with this "out" crowd more often. In fact, I did enjoy my time that afternoon, and from those meaningful conversations was able to have ongoing relationships with guys I otherwise didn't have much interaction with. But the next time we had a social gathering like this, and my hand was healed, I was back on the courts, not giving my new friends a second thought.
But I think about that retreat every so often, especially when I'm in a setting that's totally comfortable for me but might not as much for others who are new and/or in some way feeling like they're in the "out" crowd. I can't say that I'm a very good welcomer, but I know better now that I ought to be.
Church retreats in high school and college were, for me and my friends, a great opportunity to play hoops. The usual Saturday afternoon free time was spent almost exclusively to "fellowshipping" over competitive games, good exercise, and the occasional smack talk.
One summer retreat, my hand was in a cast (ironically, I had broken it playing basketball). So when Saturday afternoon free time rolled around, all my friends headed for the courts. I instinctively headed there with them, but found sitting on the sideline to be not nearly as much fun as being in between the lines. So I left the area in search of an alternative free time activity.
I found a handful of guys moping around. These were guys on the outside of the social structure, mostly because of their lack of interest and/or talent in sports. For an afternoon, I was one of them. And it struck me how unwelcome this group must have felt at the retreat, and perhaps among the entire church, just because they weren't into sports. Having studied Jesus' life during the school year, I wondered if we weren't doing a terrible thing here, outcasting these guys and making them feel so unwelcome and outsiderish.
I'd like to say that I got religion (literally) and found myself hanging out with this "out" crowd more often. In fact, I did enjoy my time that afternoon, and from those meaningful conversations was able to have ongoing relationships with guys I otherwise didn't have much interaction with. But the next time we had a social gathering like this, and my hand was healed, I was back on the courts, not giving my new friends a second thought.
But I think about that retreat every so often, especially when I'm in a setting that's totally comfortable for me but might not as much for others who are new and/or in some way feeling like they're in the "out" crowd. I can't say that I'm a very good welcomer, but I know better now that I ought to be.
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