When Donkeys Talk

It was by coincidence, but not really since there are no coincidences
under God's direction, that I read the 22nd chapter of the book of
Numbers the morning of my first day at my new job as a consultant. It
is a hilarious account of how a king asks a prophet to curse God's
people so that he can win his battle against them. The prophet
refuses on the grounds that he can't well curse a people without first
consulting God to see if they are indeed cursed. But the king keeps
upping the fee, and so the prophet agrees to meet with him. Only the
prophet's donkey, under the influence of God, keeps redirecting him
away from this meeting, and finally just up and says, "Where do you
think you're going?" The image of a prophet, surrounded by the king's
regal envoy, being bucked left and right by a divinely-inspired ass,
is one that makes me laugh out loud even now.

It was no coincidence that I read this very chapter on the day that I
was to start as a consultant. For it is tempting in this industry,
particularly as we tackle such political hot-potatoes as tax abatement
and legalized gambling, to arrive at whatever answer the client is
paying for, regardless of what the data says. Just like the prophet
was tempted to take the king's money and lay a curse on a people he
knew were not cursed, consultants are tempted to take their client's
fee and say what they want to hear. Thankfully, the company I'm
joining is one that takes seriously its objective, analytical, and
apolitical role. Still, it's good to know that even if I cave in a
little, God can do things like make donkeys talk to keep me from
betraying my integrity.