HOW TO BE THERE FOR THE BUSY

I spoke at a PENN Christian gathering last fall about “gods” that are prevalent on elite academic institutions, busyness being one of them. A student came up to me afterwards and asked me a great question: “I can apply your talk to my life, in terms of not giving into busyness; but as one who desires to have an influence on those around me, how can I be there for others when no one has any time for relational things?”

It was a good question, one that wasn’t nearly as relevant when I was a college student in the early 1990’s. Back then, the pace was slower, and peoples’ schedules weren’t on steroids like they are now. Our Christian group stressed authentic relationships and lived out the truth that people are the most important thing. So we spent a lot of time together, and invited our non-believing friends into this mix of meaningful interactions and deep friendships.

Fast-forward (literally) about fifteen years. People are taking more classes, working more jobs, and involved in more activities. Personal maintenance takes more time, because men are into the metrosexual thing, women seem more concerned with physical appearance, and both genders exercise with much greater fervor. Friendships have become more diffuse, with the volume of connections and the geographic distances and the fast-paced nature leading to weaker and shallower relationships, though no less meaningful or authentic.

I exaggerate slightly for contrast. But I don’t think I’m just some old fart who thinks life was slower and better back when. I honesty think the world is faster now, and technology and society have conspired to particularly accelerate the pace of life and friendships for Ivy League college students.

So how does a God-fearing Christian accord themselves in such a setting, so as to be influential for the Kingdom in terms of relationships? Such was the question that was posed to me last fall. I had to concede that in many cases, we could live out our Christian lives and be available to those around us and never be taken up on that offer. But we ought not give up.

Nor should we shelter ourselves with other Christians who are saying no to busyness and yes to a richer, deeper existence. Jesus balanced a hectic schedule with time with his Father, and both his busyness in always being on the go and his discipline in waking up early for quiet time are impressive, both worthy of imitating. We also, for the sake of our mission to introduce others to Jesus, should be active in campus life, taking classes and attending parties and joining clubs, and in doing so, making meaningful and authentic (albeit shallow and short-lived) connections with those around us.

I offered to the student who had asked me the question two consolations. One is that if we are truly in relationship with God, no matter how frenetic the schedules of those around us, they will sense something different about us, because God makes Himself known through His people in this way. Secondly, in four years, everyone has at least one or two (usually a handful) of moments when they need to get off the merry-go-round. Personal tragedies, mental breakdowns, and other inflection moments do happen. And when they do, Christians should have conducted themselves in such a way that people will seek them out in those moments. And in a rat race, those connections will be all the more meaningful.

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